Shakespeare’s Sonnet 42 delves into the complex emotions of love, jealousy, and self-sacrifice. In this poem, the speaker laments a situation in which his beloved is involved with a friend, causing him inner turmoil. Yet, in his selfless love, the speaker seeks to excuse his friend and ultimately finds a form of twisted joy. Through this sonnet, Shakespeare explores themes of love’s pain, the intertwining of friendship and romantic desire, and the paradoxical nature of emotional suffering. The poem follows the traditional structure of a Shakespearean sonnet, with three quatrains and a final rhymed couplet.
Shakespeare’s Sonnet 42
That thou hast her, it is not all my grief,
And yet it may be said I loved her dearly;
That she hath thee is of my wailing chief,
A loss in love that touches me more nearly.
Loving offenders, thus I will excuse ye:
Thou dost love her because thou know’st I love her,
And for my sake even so doth she abuse me,
Suff’ring my friend for my sake to approve her.
If I lose thee, my loss is my love’s gain,
And losing her, my friend hath found that loss;
Both find each other, and I lose both twain,
And both for my sake lay on me this cross.
But here’s the joy: my friend and I are one;
Sweet flattery! then she loves but me alone.
The Structure and Tone of Sonnet 42
Sonnet 42 adheres to the typical Shakespearean sonnet form, consisting of 14 lines written in iambic pentameter. The rhyme scheme follows ABAB CDCD EFEF GG, with each quatrain exploring a different aspect of the speaker’s feelings and the concluding couplet offering a surprising resolution. The sonnet begins with the speaker’s sorrow, followed by the justification of his friend’s actions, and concludes with an ironic twist of joy.
The tone of Sonnet 42 shifts throughout the poem. It begins with sorrow and jealousy as the speaker grieves the loss of his lover to his friend. The second quatrain moves towards a more forgiving, even rational tone, as the speaker justifies his friend’s behavior. By the final couplet, however, the tone becomes paradoxical: while the speaker still laments the loss, he finds a peculiar sense of joy in the idea that his friend and lover both love him alone. There is a sense of bitter irony and emotional complexity, highlighting the speaker’s internal conflict.
Analysis of Sonnet 42
Lines 1–4
“That thou hast her, it is not all my grief,
And yet it may be said I loved her dearly;
That she hath thee is of my wailing chief,
A loss in love that touches me more nearly.”
In these opening lines, the speaker acknowledges the pain of seeing his lover with his friend. However, he admits that the greater sorrow arises not from the fact that his friend has won her heart, but from the deeper emotional wound caused by the situation. While the speaker is grieved by his own love for the woman, he is more deeply affected by the loss of her affection to a friend, someone with whom he shares a personal bond. The emotional depth of the speaker’s grief suggests the intertwining of love and friendship, both of which have been threatened by the circumstances.
Lines 5–8
“Loving offenders, thus I will excuse ye:
Thou dost love her because thou know’st I love her,
And for my sake even so doth she abuse me,
Suff’ring my friend for my sake to approve her.”
In this quatrain, the speaker adopts a tone of rationalization, offering an excuse for both his friend and his lover. He perceives both as “loving offenders” who are caught in a difficult situation. The speaker is not angry at his friend for loving the woman but understands that this love arises because his friend knows that the speaker loves her. The irony here lies in the fact that the woman, despite her affection for the speaker, is using the speaker’s friend to further her own desires, thus “abusing” him in the process. In this way, the speaker’s suffering is compounded by the knowledge that both his friend and lover are acting out of a shared understanding of his own feelings.
Lines 9–12
“If I lose thee, my loss is my love’s gain,
And losing her, my friend hath found that loss;
Both find each other, and I lose both twain,
And both for my sake lay on me this cross.”
The speaker moves into a more complex expression of loss. If he loses his friend, it means that his lover will gain his affection, and if he loses the woman, his friend will gain her love. The tragic irony is that both his love and friendship are now intertwined in a way that causes the speaker to lose both simultaneously. The metaphor of the “cross” represents the burden of this emotional suffering. The speaker’s sacrifice is profound, as he has allowed both his love and his friend to claim what he has lost, all for the sake of maintaining peace between them. This passage explores the depth of sacrifice and the tension between love and friendship.
Lines 13–14
“But here’s the joy: my friend and I are one;
Sweet flattery! then she loves but me alone.”
In the final couplet, the tone shifts dramatically. Despite the preceding sorrow and sacrifice, the speaker finds a strange form of joy in the idea that, in loving both his friend and the woman, they are ultimately united in their affection for him. The phrase “Sweet flattery!” suggests that the speaker takes pleasure in the fact that both his friend and the woman’s actions, however painful, ultimately confirm his importance. The phrase “she loves but me alone” is ironic because the speaker’s initial pain stems from the fact that his love for her is not reciprocated fully—yet here, in his grief, he derives a sense of satisfaction from the idea that both of them are now united in their feelings for him.
Conclusion
Shakespeare’s Sonnet 42 offers a masterful exploration of love’s paradoxes, the complexity of relationships, and the emotional sacrifices made for the sake of others. Through a sequence of powerful emotions, the speaker navigates feelings of grief, jealousy, self-sacrifice, and ultimately, a bittersweet joy. The sonnet’s structure and tonal shifts amplify the emotional turmoil that the speaker endures. The resolution in the final couplet—while seemingly a moment of consolation—leaves the reader with a lingering sense of irony, showcasing Shakespeare’s ability to capture the nuanced and contradictory nature of human emotions.
